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Connect and Grow Magzine - Edition 11 July- August 2024
Change comes with practice and commitment. Natalia has some amazing strategies in this article.
Now is a great time to invest in every aspect of YOU!
It’s the perfect time to get back to basics; press pause, reassess and reflect.
In June, we focused on replenishing our body, mind, and soul with self-care.
But what if you’re unhappy with your self-care level or haven’t been able to make your desired change stick?
You can use willpower to make changes over the short term. But this approach doesn’t guarantee lasting change. You’ll likely lose interest, procrastinate, or get stuck in a stop-start pattern.
If you find it hard to follow through on something, it doesn’t mean that you’re lazy or that there’s something wrong with you. There’s probably something deeper at play.
It’s likely that, at some level, the change doesn’t feel safe, or there’s stress associated with either the activity or its result. In this case, you can’t reason nor logic your way out. Your nervous system also needs support to calm down against the perceived threat.
One contributing factor relates to our thought patterns and beliefs, usually at a subconscious level.
For instance, you’d like to undertake a self-care activity but something in your past has supported the creation of a subconscious belief that self-care is selfish or that you don’t deserve self-care.
Even though you take action and consciously want to do something caring for yourself, the unconscious belief that you don’t deserve self-care sabotages your positive intent. Going against this unconscious belief (even with a positive behaviour) creates discomfort and stress, so we stop the change and revert to the safe comfort zone that supports the underlying undeserving belief.
The good news is that beliefs can be changed - they’re only the thoughts we keep thinking. There are ways to disrupt these thinking patterns and embed new ways of thinking and being. Although, it does require awareness, willingness and effort.
One way to explore where our subconscious beliefs are tripping us up is to check in with our emotions and how our body feels.
Whenever you think about practising self-care, what sensations or emotions come up? Do you feel good? Tired? Or guilty? The aim is to have positive feelings.
Explore how these self-care-related belief statements feel:
It is safe and ok for me to prioritise my wellbeing and self-care.
It is safe and ok for me to ask for support.
It is safe and ok for me to accept help from others.
My self-care needs matter.
I deserve self-care.
I safely and easily find ways to practise self-care.
As you read through each statement, check how your body feels.
If you feel discomfort or stress, it indicates resistance to the belief. If so, it shows us where we need more support during the change.
When we want to change but can’t make it stick, something deeper usually happens. It’s likely related to our subconscious beliefs. Awareness of these limiting beliefs helps to show us where we need more support to improve our self-care and embed more supportive beliefs.
Written by Natalia Walker
Natalia is available for consultations.
Email: natalia@innercreative.com.au
(C) 2024 Break Free Consultancy, Connect and Grow